As a born a bred New Yorker, this day is a hard one for me to swallow.  It was the day the face of my home was forever changed, the day life as we knew it in this country forever changed, and it ushered in a time of fear, worry and resilience.   I was not in NY on 9/11 but that doesn’t mean like so many others in our country and around the world we were not affected. I know I was.

I remember thinking how sorry I felt for the pilot who was not able to miss a 110 story tall building.  How naïve I was, but then the second plane crashed, and the third, and the fourth…. I was at work watching my world forever change not knowing what I was witnessing. But 17 years later as I watch the opening of the remembrance ceremony at ground zero my eyes well with tears as my throat closes and I want to weep for all of those who were lost 17 years ago today.  I also grieve for the way of life that was take from us on that fateful day.

Forever and always we have to face our mortality in a whole new way.  There has always been apprehension with some when flying, now we live in a world in which we wonder for a split second if there is someone on our flight willing to do what was done on that day.  As I write this my own mother is in a plane flying in the air to New York City, and do you know what I say? Good for her! I hope there are many people flying today, to show those who wished to see us crumble in fear, that we may be afraid but we will not back down.

But, that got me thinking on the topics of for fear, anxiety, and depression. Since 9/11 if we allowed ourselves to drown in to it we could drown in our fears and sorrows, and some of us need to go there for a while and that’s ok.  When you have witnessed or experienced a horribly traumatic event such as 9/11, it can be hard to know which way is up. And if we find our way through the depression and anxiety we may not think we have what it takes to pull ourselves out.  But that is what is so important, we must do what we can to work our way out.

When it comes to depression, it is a mental health disorder in which you experience a low or sad mood more often than not and it affects the way you think, feel and behave.  You feel sad, down, empty, can experience frequent crying, have lost interest or pleasure in things that used to make you happy, and no matter how much you want to, nothing helps you feel better.  It has physical effects on you as well. It can make you extremely tired due to the insomnia or hypersomnia that comes with depression, you can feel achy or even ill. All of this leads to changes in behavior as well, you can find that you isolate yourself more because you don’t want to be a burden on your friends and loved ones who seem to be fine so why bring them down with your stuff right?  Wrong! No matter what has caused the depressive state you are in, keeping yourself isolated from the world, although seems like a good idea, only helps you sink further into your depression.

So if we are in a depressed state what can we do to help ourselves out?  My first piece of advice is to get help! Whether you seek the counsel of a good friend or go straight for professional help, get help!  Your depression wants you alone, isolated, and lonely so it can wreak havoc on your mind, don’t let it. You also need to reframe the thoughts that are keeping you in a depressive state and repeat the positive self-talk over and over again until you start to believe it.  You can also try journaling to help express the unresolved emotions that have kept you in a depressive state. There are so many things that can be done to help lessen and alleviate your depression, but there is one key ingredient. It is willingness. You must be willing to do the work.  Getting depressed was not a quick and easy process, getting out of it might not be either, but I am here to tell you that although it can feel like running through drying cement, working your way out of depression is not impossible.

If you or someone you know may be struggling with depression, please know that it is only part of your journey, depression is not your final destination.  It is normal to have ups and downs in life, but when we get suck in the down swings, please know that is not normal and there is help. We would love to help walk you through your own journey here at Agape Therapy Institute.

Written by Iliana Torres, LMHC
Therapist at Agape Therapy Institute
To book an appointment with Iliana, please call (407) 900-8633

September 10, 2018 is National Suicide Prevention Day 

The National Alliance on Mental Health states that, “each year more than 34,000 individuals take their own life, leaving behind thousands of friends and family members to navigate the tragedy of their loss. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death among adults in the U.S. and the 3rd leading cause of death among adolescents” (NAMI).

A few ways we can partake in National Suicide Prevention Day are by being aware of possible warning signs and risks, what resources are available, and by engaging in activities to raise awareness about suicide.

Potential Warning Signs in Behavior:

• Withdrawal from social settings or gatherings  
• Increased use of substances (drugs, alcohol)
• Reckless or unusual behavior
• Threats or comments about death, including speaking or writing about it

Potential Risks: 

• Family history of suicide
• History of trauma or abuse
• A recent loss or tragedy
• Substance abuse

See more risks and warning signs to look for from NAMI by clicking here.

Suggested Activities for Raising Awareness of Suicide:

• Light A Candle Near a Window at 8:00 PM in remembrance of lost ones
• Cycle Around The Globe to raise awareness and funds for research

See other activities and volunteer opportunities here at the NAMI website.

If you or someone you know may be struggling with thoughts of suicide or depression, call The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-TALK (8255) or text HOME to 741741 for 24/7 Crisis Counseling.

If you’d like to talk to one of our counselors, call our office at 407-900-8633 to setup an appointment.

Written by Kelsey Noonan, Patient Care Coordinator at Agape Therapy Institute.

#TransformationTuesday #WaybackWednesday #ThrowbackThursday #FacetoFaceFriday

By Iliana Bianca Torres, MS, LMHC at Agape Therapy Institute

It’s funny with the advent of social media that we have these named days of the week.  My personal favorite is #TacoTuesday, but it got me thinking.   Do we need a specific day of the week to make certain topics a focus?  I think not. But taking from the named days of the week I want to focus on #TransformationTuesday.

It means different things to different people.  Some have pulled themselves up from their boot straps and made their lives completely different, others learned to take control of their lives and learn to live better, while others make physical, relational, or emotional transformations.

In the scope of complete transparency, #TransformationTuesday means a lot to me because of the transformations I have made in my own life.  I understand what it means to live as a post bariatric surgical patient and all the physical, mental, and emotional changes that come with it.  How completely alone you feel in your pain and the shame you feel for having “let yourself go” to the point where you need surgical intervention.  Everyone’s reasoning for bariatric surgery may be different, however, the journey remains similar for us all. It is a special club that unfortunately you pay admission for with your health.

The process of getting approved for the surgery comes with its own struggles as well as preparing for it.  Going through the actual surgery and then allowing yourself to ask for help during the healing process can be difficult for some.  The recovery would be nearly impossible for even the strongest of people to go through alone. You may also find that what was already within you becomes amplified through this journey, meaning unresolved issues or emotions you may have thought you had a handle on suddenly resurface.  It may bring up things you didn’t even realize you needed to deal with until you got real with yourself about your health, because getting real with yourself about your health forces you to become real with yourself about the role you played in the decline of your own health.

It is grueling to think about.  I can remember the years of research I did on the different types of surgeries, their outcomes, and on the surgeons themselves.   But to do that I first had to admit that I was no longer in control of my own health and needed medical intervention. In retrospect I should have sought counseling during this time because you become very vulnerable through this entire process and having a mental health professional to walk me through this process would have been so beneficial.  Are you struggling with your health and considering bariatric surgery? Or maybe you have already gone through the surgery and find yourself struggling through the healing process. Is the weight of it all too much too bare? Are you looking for someone who can walk you through the process from a been there done that perspective? There is a safe place for you to work through these issues at Agape Therapy Institute.

About Iliana Torres, MS, LMHC

Iliana Torres, MS is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor at Agape Therapy Institute.  She works with children, adolescents and adults in individual, couples and family counseling.  She works with a wide array of issues that people present with in counseling (not just those that concern weight and eating), including substance abuse and addiction, anxiety, depression, OCD, identity, trauma, and more.  To book an appointment with her, call our office at (407) 900-8633 or go online to agape.clientsecure.me to self schedule.